Eating Out with Kids
Public dining with children, minus public embarrassment
I used to look at children in restaurants and think how nice it would be to be able to go out with our little one and introduce him to the plethora of cuisines, which are now so readily available in Sydney. Now I watch in anticipation to see how other parents hope to entertain their offspring and minimise the impact zone when the poop inevitably hits the fan.
When our Cheeky Monkey was a tiny little squish, we convinced ourselves it would be much easier once we weren’t timing our meals around breastfeeds. It turns out that as children get older they inconveniently also get bigger, more energetic, louder and transition through a ridiculous phase of throwing everything within arms reach onto the floor.
I usually time catch-up sessions with friends to be coffee and tend to make sure I’m near a park. It serves the dual purpose of stretching the budget and keeping Cheeky Monkey happy. This week I tempted fate and ate lunch at a newish hipster café because it looked amazing, I had serious Instagram food envy and it suited the friend I was meeting.
I deliberately timed our meet for Monkey’s own lunch time but it all went out the window on arrival, with a fifteen minute wait for a table. The situation deteriorated further when I realized the high chair I had requested was plonked in the tiny gap between two tables. There was, no kidding, maybe three inches between the back of the highchair and the next table. This meant almost the entire contents of both tables were in easy grabbing distance.
The next 45 minutes comprised of me apologizing profusely to all diners within hearing distance, deflecting reaching hands like a ninja, bribing Monkey with anything I could get my hands on interspersed with me doing my best JungleGym impersonation. As soon as the meals were done we were out of there, again spouting apologies like nobody’s business. I should add that the food was stunning with Cheeky Monkey wolfing almost half of my slow cooked lamb with pea mash, but was unimpressed with his first taste of pomegranate.
Some people are blessed with angelic cherubs who happily sit there while Mummy sips her Sauv Blanc, but I’m not one of them. My child is like a heavily caffeinated Taz Devil, so any foodie ventures have to be planned to minimise impact to the local inhabitants and environs. I’ve also started taking note of possible strategies I’ve seen other people have success with in the off chance one day my Monkey decides he wants to cease being a force of nature and experience culture through food.
Do your research
Before you commit to a particular venue, have a look at the menu. Cheeky Monkey mostly eats off my plate so I need to make sure there’s something he will eat. If you can have a look at pictures as well to see how much space there is for a pram incase no highchairs are available. Bonus points for any place you can dine al fresco or has a playground attached.
Choose your time
It goes without saying that the best time for you to eat is when your little one is due to be eating too - unless they’re still breastfed, for some reason people don’t like eating while your boobs are out. I try to give Monkey a run around before sitting down, and make sure I’m not running too close to nap time.
Pick your distraction
Travel games, colouring pages and small toys are all tried and true avoidance manouvers, which have proven effective with older kids. Plenty of parents seem to be using phones and tablets nowadays, though I’m secretly hoping we can avoid them in our future dining ventures. Most of our current distractions seem to submit to gravity and are on the floor within seconds. I can sometimes get around this by using our sippy cup leash and tying things onto the highchair. I find that busier places with lots of visual distractions also give us a bit longer to eat our meals.
Cheeky Monkey’s Top Five Sydney Dining Locations
1. Deli in the Park, East Lindfield
2. Sprout, Naremburn
3. New Shanghai Lemon Grove, Chatswood
4. Bathers Pavillion, Balmoral Beach
5. The Grounds of Alexandria, Alexandria
Where are your favourite places to dine out with your kids?
Aimee Toby